Picking up the pieces of a broken girl
by AllieKat21
Summary: She is suffering the consequences of her actions, but in the prosses has become more broken than before. Now some one is going to help her but it might just end up hurting more, unless some one can save her from them.
1. Default Chapter

**Hey everyone I wanted to write this story while it was still fresh in my mind..or atleast the first chapter lol, well anyway I own no one in this story. And it takes place after Secrets not to far off right after Emma gos to the clinic. and yes it is another Emma/Jay story, sorry can't help it I love them togeather. Anyway please review it even if you hate it. Oh and I own none of the songs used here.**

**Allie**

**CHAPTER 1/FALLING DOWN.**

_I stand alone _

_I'm on my own_

_My hands will bleed ( my hands will bleed)_

_I'm holding on to what is gone_

_What's left of me?_

_'Falling down"- Story of the year._

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Emma Nelson walked into Degrassi with her head facing down, everyone knew. They all knew about what had happen at the ravine. It had been weeks since everyone found out about the STD that Alex and Amy had gotten from Jay. But some one had found out that Emma had been tested for it and that her test came back positive. But who found out and told everyone, she didn't know and she didn't care. She felt like her world had finally crummbled beneith her, at least before she had something to hold on to, to keep her head above the surface. But now that was gone and day by day she felt her self struggaling for breath and wanting to run and hide form the stares peopel were giving her, she wanted to cover her ears so she couldn't hear their laughs and jokes and comments about her. But mostly she wanted to her family to look at her again, her mom kept herself busy at the salon but would atleast talk to Emma her father on the other hand wouldn't even look at her much less talk to her.

opening her locker she felt some one staring at her she looked out the corner of her eye and saw him. The one person who kept her from falling, but the one person who helped destroy her also:Jay. He was watching her with the same look he gave her back stage the night of the play, she quickly turned away form him and walked to homeroom. They hadn't spoken since that night at the play but every now and then she would catch him looking at her and at times she caught herself looking at him or thinking about him. She sat in homeroom drawing not paying attention to anyone around her, she jumped when someone placed their hand onher shoulder looking over she saw her oldest and probably her only friend left: Manny. "Hey Em how you holding up?" "I'm okay I guess it's just hard to be here you know with everyone looking and talking." she knew Manny wouldn't judge her at first Manny had bveen disappointed and angry with her but then when everything got around school she knew Emma needed a friend so she was there for her when ever she needed her. "Yea I know don't worry it'll get easier. Hey how about you and I go shopping today after school, take your mind off your problems?" Emma thought about it and then nodde her head yes making Manny smile. "Good you'll have fun Em I promise." she said and faced the teacher as homeroom started.

Jay sat in his class thinking about Emma he had been watching her for awhile ever since that first time in the ravine, well he had been watching her for longer since earlier this year. But more so now, he knew everything about Emma and him had gotten out and how much it hirt her. He wanted to make sure she was okay so he kept an eye on her. She looked so broken and fragile like she was about to crummble to pieces in front of him, he wanted to pretect her form all of this and damnit if he ever found out who spread all these personal things about her around he would kill them. He wanted Emma back, his Emma. When they were togeather they were happy. They would joke around with his friends after they were done, and just enjoy themselves. He wanted to talk to her but he wasn't sure what to say and he wasn't sure she would believe him but he was going to get her to belive him. He got her into this mess and was determined to get her out of it.

At the mall later that day Manny and Emma were walking around shopping. Manny was right Emma was having fun and wasn't think about school and her family, or anything of her problems. They walked into another store and were looking trough the racks of cloths and laughing about everything. When Manny grabbed onto Emma's arm. "What, what's the matter?" she asked when she felt Manny grab her and saw the look on her face. "okay look over there." Manny said in a hushed voice and pointing. Emma looked and saw a couple of guys standing there maybe about a year older than them. "Yea so what?" "So what? Em that guy is so checkign you out." she said with a smile on her face. Emma looked again and did see one of the guys looking at her and smiling at her. She smiled back and then turned back to MAnny. "Manny he is, and he's so cute." she said with a laugh. The guy had blonde hair that was spiked to perfection and bright green eyes, and a great smile. He had his lip pierced and his right eye brow done too. He smiled at them again and began walking over. "Oh my God Em they're coming over here!!" Manny was practically jumping up and down. "Manny what do you care you have a boyfriend remember." "oh yea but you don't."

"Hey I'm Kenny." the one who had been staring at Emma said when they reached the girls. "Hey I'm Emma and this is Manny." she said pointing to Manny who waved at them. "Cool this is Tyler, and David." Kenny said pointing to his friends. "So Emma you look pretty familer, and I don't mean that as a line you really do." "I don't know maybe we saw each other some where." "yea, um have you everhung out at the ravine before?" he asked and Emma looked down some what embarrassed, "Yea I have but not anymore." Manny could tell she wanted to get out of there so she took hold of her friend's arm "Come on Em lets go." they went to leave but Kenny grabbed her other arm. "Emma I'm sorry did I say something wrong?" "no it's just never mind." "Well here I have to go but here's my number." he took her hand and wrote his number on it before turning her hand over and kissing it and giving her a smile that would make anyone weak in the knees. Emma didn't get a chance to say anything before him and his friends left.

"Kenny you know that's Jay's girl right?" Tyler asked him as they got into his car. "No they were never togeather and besides I want her now screw him." Kenny said speeding away. "Dude I wouldn't mess with her Jay had her first and I think he likes her." Tyler said, trying to get through to his friend. "DAMNIT I don't care she's mine and damnit this one is going to be fun." he said with a smirk. Tyler and David knew where this is was going to go. Everything Jay had Kenny wanted and once he got it he threw it away like it was nothing he usually did this with Jay's girls, he had tried it with Alex but she was tougher than the others. And around the ravine things got out too so Kenny knew all the probles Emma was having and that would make it so much easier.

The next day at school Emma felt a little better, after the mall yesterday Manny and Emma just hung out and watched tv just like they used to. Manny had talked her into wearing one of the new outfits she bought yesterday. It was just a simple pair of not to tight low rise jeans and a light pink fitted tee shirt that a picture of a picture of a couple sitting at a table in a old diner, and at the top it said "Cherry's soda shop" and under the picture it say's "Best table service in town" and a black zipper sweatshirt on with a picture of a heart with a banner around it and an arrow going through the heart. It said "Love will tear us apart." Manny had pulled her long hair into a french braid and done her make up lightly just like Emma liked to wear it. For the firsdt time in awhile she felt better about herself, and she was thinking about that guy Kenny she had met. She sat in class smiling to herself but then she thought of what she is going through and wasn't so sure she wanted to see any body just yet.

Jay had seen Emma come into school today and she looked a litlte better today he knew that the comments still bothered her but it looked like something was going on that had her mind distracted. He had finally got the guts to talk to her, he had to atleast try to make it up to her. After first period Jay found her walking by herself and ran up to her. "Emma, Em wait up." he said as he caught up to her. "What do you want Jay?" she asked not looking him in the eye. "I just want to make sure your okay, are you okay?" he was actually worried about her and she saw that when she looked up into his eyes. "I'm not okay Jay, my father won't look at me I have only one friend left, everyone keeps talking.And I don't have...." she stoped herself before she said she doesn't have him. "Emma I am so sorry that this is happening to you I never wanted.." she cut him off before he could finish "well it's a little late for soory's Jay what's done is done and neither of us can turn back the clock. I have to go." her voice was breaking as she was talking, Jay wanted to go after but he just stood there. He knew she was right, he couldn't turn back time but he can make a fresh start with her if she'll let him. 'God I need her, please let this work out okay.' he thought as he slwloy walked away.

That afternoon when Emma got home she went down to her room and sat on the bed staring at her phone. Her mom was at work, her dad was at a meeting and the baby was at daycare. Taking a deep breath she dialed Kenny's number, but she got his answering machine so she took another breath and left him a message. "Hey Kenny it's Emma, I was wondering fi you wanted to go out some time, so give me a call when you get this my number is, (402)-596-3218, bye." she hung up the phone and laied back on the bed. And pulled out her journal.

_Okay so today I felt a little better I think it was because Manny and I had fun yesterday. Oh and something pretty good happened at the mall yesterday too, I met a guy. I know it's probably not a good idea to try something with some one new right now with everything going on but it's just one date and he might not even say yes. My only problem is I can't tell if I want to go out with him becuse he seems like some one I could get along with or because I'm trying to forget about Jay and the feelings I ahve for him. I know that sounds so crazy, but I do. Everyone just thinks I gave him head and he went down on me, and yea we did that stuff but we just hung out too and had fun. And I miss all of it I liked being with him I want it back but I know we can never get that back, too much bad stuff has happened with all the good that came out of it. I got sick adn now my family and friedns can't stand me but when I was him, I don't know I felt alive again. I felt wanted and cared for and that's all I really ever wanted he kept me from falling and I did the same for him. But now he's gone and I'm falling down and no one can help me. I just want to feel that way again and with him but I won't admit it to anyone, damn my stubborness. I hae to go now my mom is home._

_Love Emma._

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_I'm falling down_

_But I should findmy strength in this_

_A light burns to reconnect_

_My heart for what it's meant to give._

_"falling down"- Story of the year_

**Okay here you go the first chapter of my new story please review it. I just came up with this the other night so let me know if it sucks or not.**

**Allie**


	2. Scared

**Okay guys I'm posting chapter two of this story but if I don't get more reviews this time then I'm gonna take it down because I'm trying really hard to make this one good. So please review once you read it even if you hate it but give a reason and if you have any ideas then please let me know. And I own no one in the story ewxcept the people you don't recognise. and I don't own the songs used.**

**CHAPTER 2/SCARED.**

_At night I hear it creeping_

_At night I feel it move_

_I'll never sleep here anymore._

_"Scared"-Three Days Grace._

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Kenny had called Emma back and said he wanted to go out with her that weekend. They had done the normal datre,a moive and then jsut getting to know each other. As time went on they developed a realtionship and Emma felt more at ease with him, she hadn't felt that in a long time, the only other time she felt that was with Jay. And that was startign to annoy her, her mind kept going back to Jay. She would catch him looking at her and she would find her self doing the same thing. She would never admit it but she missed him, and she knew he missed her. But she had Kenny and she was happy with him, so why did her mind keep going back to Jay. She wanted clouser that's what she kept tellign herself and once she got it he would leave her mind, and she was going to get it. That night he wasn't at the ravine anymore so she was going to his house to wee him.

Later that night when her parents were out, she left her house to go talk to Jay. When Kenny had called and asked to see her that night she told him she had to study, she knew Kenny and Jay weren't the greatest friends so she didn't want to upset him. Emma stood on Jay's door step shaking she was scared to be there for some reason.'Maybe because we haven't spoken in awhile.' she thought as she knocked on the door. After a few minutes Jay answered the door in a pair of pajama pants riding low on his hips and no shirt on. Emma had to tear her eyes away form his bare chest, adn looke into his eyes. "Em what are you doing here?" he asked openign the door lettign her in.

"Um I need to talk to you." she said looking at him and then down at her hands. "okay so whats up?" he lead them into the den and sat on the couch and Emma sat next to him and turend to face him. "Why can't I get you out of my head?" she asked him,her eyes were pleading with him to give her an answer. But he didn't have one because then he would need one because she was in his head all the time. "I don't know Emma, but when you find out can you give me a call." he said smiling, he was trying to get rid of some of the tension in the room, and it worked because she smiled shyly at him through her lashes. "Emma I know you'll tell me to shut up but you have to listen to me for a minute." he took her hadn in his and continued to talk when she looked at him and didn't pull away from him.

"Look Emma I know your not going to want to hear any of this but what I said that night at the play..it was all true." he looked down and then abck at her. "I miss you and not just what we've done, you as a person I miss spending time with you. I want you back Emma." he had taken hold of her face and wiped the tears form her eyes, she had started to tear up when he first started to talk. "I miss you too Jay but we can't have anything back, we didn't really have anything to begin with." she wanted to pull away but couldn't, he was a drug to her and no matter what she couldn't resist him, but she had to fight it. "Emma we had something it could have been something really great, you just have to let me help you, I can see it in your eyes Emma your still lost but when you were with me you had happiness in your eyes. I can give it back to you."

"No Jay as much as I want you too you can't give it back you'll just end up hurting me and I can't put myself through tat again." with that she got up and left the house but before she left he said one more thing. "Fine then just don't talk to me anymore and when you get hurt again don't come crying to me." he said with anger When she got home she noticed her cell phone had a few messages she hd left it at home not wanting to talk to anyone. All of the messages were from Kenny and all of them were the same thing. He wanted to know wherre she was and it seemed like with each one the tone of his voice would change. The first one he was his normal self but thne in the second he sounded a little ticked off and in the thir he was pissed off, she was kinda scared of it so sh turned the phone off and just laid down in bed and fell asleep.

It's a good thing the next day was a saturday, because Emma didn't wake up till almost one O'clock in the afternoon the next day. She woke up to her cell phone buzzing next to her, she must have not turned it off the night before. She reached form under the covers to picke it up, too tired to see who was calling, but she knew once an angry voice came through on the line. "WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU!!??!?" it was Kenny and the yelling woke her up right away. "I was out last night, don't yell at me Kenny." she said sitting up in bed. "Damnit Emma I didn't know where you were and I want to know." he had calmed down some but still kept a firm voice. "I'm sorry I just neede time to myself last night." Kenny calmed down a bit, "okay fine how about tonight you come to a party with me?" Emma thought about it for a minute she wanted to be by herself again but didn't want to upset Kenny, a small part of her was a little scared of him but she would never admit it to anyone she played it off as just new relationship nerves. "Yea sure how about seven?" "sure see you then." he said and hung up.

Around seven that night Emma was ready and waiting for Kenny, she had showered and changed. She still wanted to be alone for the night but she wanted to make Kenny happy. When the door bell rang she called out to her mom and told her she would be back by curfew. When she opened the door Kenny was standing there but didn't look happy at all. "Hi." she said coming out of the house. "whatever lets just go." he took her arm and squeezed it pulling her towards his car. "oww Kenny your hurting me." she said once he let go and put her in the car, "whatever jsut be quiet." he said and pulled away form the house. Emma sat there in silence rubbing the spot on her arm. They were quiet in the car, when they got to the part Emma slowly opened her door and Kenny grabbed her again.

While Emma was out at the party Jay was at home on the phone with Sean. "So how is everyone back in Degrassi?" Jay leaned back and rubbed his eyes. "Fine I guess, you know Ellie is doing pretty good." "Well what about Emma last time I called her she seemed upset and hung up pretty fast." Jay closed his eyes he didn't want to tell Sean about what had happen between him and Emma but he had to, Sean was going to find out anyway. "okay look I know but your not going to be happy." "Just tell me man." "okay well I'll just cut to the chase, man I liked Em and we hooked up in the ravine." "WHAT?!?! WHY?!?!" Sean screamed into the phone. "because I liked her but it didn't go so well I got her sick man I didn't mean to but it happen and I can't take it back."

"What do you mean got her sick? Sick with what?" "Gonorrhea." he said quietly saying out loud made him regret doing what he did to her and regret tellign her to leave him alone, when he knew that if she was dating Kenny she would need some one to turn to. "Gonorrhea are you, crazy man what the hell were you thinking?!" Sean was still hystrical. "I wasn't, but don't worry she's fine now and I'm leaving her alone. Lokk I got to go." with that he hung up with out giving Sean a chance to respond. He made a mistake, when he yelled at her but he wasn't going to admit it to her he was just to stubborn.

Emma had lost site of Kenny at the party she had been talking to some one when he had went off on his own and was now looking every where for him. It was gettign kind of late and she had to get home soon, but want to spen some time with him. "Have you seen Kenny?" she asked one of his friends when she was up staires. "Yea he's in there." he said pointing to a room where another guy had gone into. Walking in she saw Kenny, Tyler, David, and a few other guys sittign around drinking and some pills and powders on a table next to them. "Kenny I want to go homew now." she said walkign over to him. "Well I don't." he went back to drinking his beer and laughing with his friends. "Fine I'll find my own way home." she turned to leave but he grabbed her arm and jerked her backwards making her stummble and fall next to him. "Your not goign any where, now stay here with me." he said through gritted teeth and tighting his hold on her arm with each word. Emma was scared so she just sat there and did what he wanted. That night she lost more of herself than she did before.

Before in the ravine she was a lost girl, but a part of her did what she did because she wanted it she wanted Jay. But now that was gone and over he wanted nothing to do with her. So she wanted and out and she got one that night. That night she lost her self in drinking and drugs, she hated this the only reason she did it was to make Kenny happy because she was afarid of him.But it didn't do anything when she wouldn't go down on him he smaked her across her face so hard it sent her flying backwards on the floor. There was no out for her she was stuck in this life too afraid to get out. She had a new addiction, and it was going to hurt her more than Jay ever would.

Emma hadn't gotten home till way past her curfew and got caught and was grounded for two weeks. The hardest thing was lieing to her mom and dad about the bruise that was forming on her cheek where Kenny had hit her. She told them that she got puhed into a door frame. She was more worried about school she didn't want anyone to see the bruise, she was afraid more rumors would spread and that everyone would find out: Find out her boyfriend hit her, that he made her drink and do drugs. She would have covered it with make up but it was sore and was a really dark purple and blue, so she couldn't cover it.

Walking into school people had noticed the bruise that had grown to the size of a baseball, she didn't really remember being hit that hard but she was, and she tried to hide it by keeping her head down, but peopel still noticed. "Em what happen to you?" Manny asked with great consern in her voice when she sat next to her in class. "It's nothing I was watching Jack and I fell while playing with him." she explained to her avoiding eye contact. "What did you hit your face on?" "oh the coffie table it was actually kind of funny." Emma smiled and played it off like it was nothing, and it worked Manny smiled at her and took her seat as class started. The day seemed to go by in slow motion, Manny looking at her worried and Emma just saying she was tired and would be just fine. And another thing that brought back memories was Jay, he kept glaringa t her and making his normal mean comments to her but she didn't let it bother her.

When school was finished Emma headed over to the Dot with Manny, to grab something to eat, she was suppoosed to go straight home but her dad had a late meeting and her mom was working late, so she was only going to stay out for a little while. "So Kenny seems like a great guy." Manny said once they sat down, and Emma became a little nervouse when that subject came up. "yea he's okay, I'm still getting to know him." she said smiling a little. The bell above the door rang and made her look over and she felt her breath catch in her throat. Walking in was Kenny and his friends, and Jay and his friends came in. Kenny gave her a smile and walked over to her. "Hi Emma." he said giving her a small kiss, amking sure Jay saw it. When he pulled back he took Emma's hand and made her stand up. "we'll be right back." he said leading her away from Manny and the others.

Kenny pulled her into the back where no one could see them, and pushed her against the wall. "You didn't tell anyone what happen last night did you." he asked in a firm voice his face very close to her and his arms trapping her. "I told them I fell." Kenny gave her a smile that made her stomach clench. "that's my girl, now tonight I'll come to your room okay." "you can't.." he cut her off bny grabbing her throat. "I'm coming over got it." she made a noise as the frip around her throat got tighter. He took that as a yes and let her go and walked back to his friends. Emma stood there and rubbed her neck and got her breathing under control. She walked back to Manny, "Sorry Manny I have to go I don't want to get in more trouble. I'll see you tomorrow okay." she gave her friend a smile and grabbed her stuff. "sure bye Em." Manny said as Emma left as fast as she could not making contact with Kenny or any of them. That's what she gets, she made mistakes and this is all of those coming back and bitting her in the ass. 'I deserve this.' she thought walking back home. She was scared of what was happing and no one could save her.

_I wish you never told me_

_I wish I never knew_

_I wake up screaming_

_It's all because of you._

_"Scared"-Three Days Grace._

**Okay guys here is the next chapter in this story. I'm not gettign a very big respone to this so please review or I'm goign to take it down. Anyway I know I'm making Emma act in a way we never thought she would, with lettign her boyfriend hit her and not get out but remember she's still not fully over what happened to Rick and Sean leaving so she';s pusnishing herself, adn think's she desevers this. Please let me know what you think.**

**Allie**


	3. Save me

**Okay well since no one wants me to get rid of this story I'll keep it up. Thank you guys for making me write, more lol. Anyway I don't own anyone and I don't own the song either it is by one of my favoirt bands. Oh and thank you to Degrassidreamer for the good idea, and part of this I got from the episode 'Never gonna give you up'.**

**CHAPTER 3/ SAVE ME.**

_Had a bad day, don't talk to me,_

_Gonna ride this out._

_My little black heart, breaks apart_

_With your big mouth._

_"Save me"- Unwritten law._

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Emma sat stiffly on her bed waiting for Kenny to get to her house. She wanted so much to tell her mother not to let him in the house but that wouldn't work he would just come through her window. She sat in her thoughts till the door to her room shut and she looked up to see Kenny coming down the staires, that same evil smile on his face. Just looking at him made shivers run through her body, but they weren't good one's. Not like the ones she would get when ever Jay would smile at her or touch her, this one made her want to run and hide from him. She really wanted to get up and run but there was no way she would get away from him, she wouldn't make it out the window before he grabbed her. "your mom let me in she said she had to go out for an hour maybe and your dad is at Joey's with Jack, so it's just you and me." the tone of his voice made the room chill even more and she had to hold back her tears, no one was here to help her it was open game now. And then it started, with one quick smake to the face, splitting her lip.

Kenny put one knee on her bed and grabbed her upper arms tightly and pushed her back on the bed. Emma's breathing became heavier when he leaned down and kissed her neck, and bit and sucked it didn't cause her pleasure it was full of pain and she struggled not to yell out she knew that he would strike her again if she did. But when he bit down too hard and she felt blood being drawn she screamed out in pain. Kenny pulled back and smaked her again and held her throat again. "Shut up." he said through gritted teeth. She tried not to cry she really did but it was no use with every move of his hands on her body she sob quietly, She paniced whe he tried to pull her shirt over her head. She was 12 years old all over again. Her mind flashed to Jordan, and she became more scared than ever, this time it was going to happen, she going to be raped. Emma did the only thing she could think of to help herself: she fought back.

Kenny didn't care if she foughtor not this is what he wanted and was going to get. "NO please Kenny please don't do this." she said through her tears as she fought against his hands, but the only damage she did was she scratched him, she tried to kick but he had pinned her legs down and apart. He had gotten her shirt off, more like ripped it off, and held her arms above her head with one hand and with the other he mannaged to push her skirt off of her , along with her underware. "no Kenny don't do this stop it please stop." she cried to him trying to keep his hands off of her but it was no use he was too strong for her. Kenny took hold of her throat again and squeezed till she was prying at his hands so she could breath. He finally managed to get inside of her, and she screamed even louder because it was her first time and he pushed hard. She felt herself bleeding but it didn't matter she stoped fighting as he pushed inside of her hard and fast, gripping her hips painfully tight, and scrathching at her flesh. She cried out again when his nails ripped her flesh,and she tried to push him off again. "Damnit Emma stop or I'll have to chock you again and tie you down!!!" he yelled at her.

Emma silently cried as her body was being violated, and on some level she kept telling herself this is what she deserved. She caused pain in other people's lives so now it was coming back at her. She helped Jay break Alex's heart, even though Alex and her weren't friends she still felt bad for her being hurt. She hurt Libertiy when she treid to get back with Chris, and most of all she hurt Rick. She rejected him, played with his emotions it was partly her fault that he was tormented at school. When it was over and Kenny got off of her he reziped his jeans and gave her his same evil smile, before leaving her with her thoughts. Emma slowly and painfully moved to wrapped her bruised and bloody body in her balnket and laid on her bed crying to herself, she didn't even know she was till she felt her tears on her face.

The next day Emma walked up from her room to see her mother in the kitchen with Jack on her hip, her back was to Emma. "Em Snake had to leave eary but he said if you wanted a ride home he would take you home, it's suppose to rain." she told her daughter without turing around. "Um maybe I might have to stay after school for something." "okay well have a good day honey." "thanks mom." with that she grabbed her bag and left the house and made her way to school. She was a little nervouse that people would be able to tell what had happen last night, she couldn't tell though. She couldn't admit that her boyfriend hit her and raped her. No one would believe her. No one could save her.

No one noticed the bruises really, she had done a pretty good job of covering them up, even though it was warm out, she wore jeans that covered the ones on her legs. A sweat shirt to cover the ones on her arms, and she left her hair down and around her neck so no one could see the ones around her neck. The ones on her face she just used make up to cover them, the only thing she couldn't do anything about was her split lip, and the throbbing pain between her legs, she knew he had done some mager damage there. But again a voice screamed at her that she was getting what she deserved. Walking down the hall she was lookign down and slamed into some one sending her stummbinling back a few steps. "Watch it!!" Emma looked up to see Alex glaring at her, "sorry." she mummbled and walked down the hall but Alex followed her. "What no comment from the princess, wow shock." Emma didn't say anythign to her, she just walked on. "Come on Emma tell my off or at least try, we miss your 'I'm-better- than-you' attitude around here." Alex was smirking at her, till Emma turned around to face her and she noticed that she had unshed tears in her eyes. Emma hadn't cried since the night before but now she was almost crying because of the pain she was feeling, inside and between her legs she had taken pills but the pain wasn't going away.

Alex didn't say anything more to her just turned and walked away while Emma gripped her stomach in pain and stummbled into the bathroom. She stood infront of the mirror holding her stomach and took deep breaths trying to stop the pain, or will her mind not to focus on it. When the door opened and Hazel walked in and saw her. "Emma are you okay?" she asked walking up to her. Emma nodded and pushed hre hair back to throw some water on her face. "Emma what happen to your neck?!" she asked suprised and looked at her. "Nothing I'm fine, I have to go." she tried to leave but Hazel stopped her. "Em is some one hurting you, maybe your new boyfriend?" she asked with caution. Emma turned to her but hid her fear and wanting to tell some one, she couldn't though no one would believe her. "No Hazel really I'm fine no one is hurting me promise." she tried to leave again but Hazel stopped her again

"Emma if he please tell me, I don't want to see what happen to Terrie happen to you. Don't keep sopmethign like this from some one. We're worried about you." "Hazel I'm fine it's I just haven't been sleeping very well, you know since the shooting I know it happened awhile but I'm just taking longer to get over it.But I'm fine really I am." she turned and gave her a small smile. "okay I understand about the shooting if you need some one to talk to, you can come to me." "Thanks Hazel." she said and left the bathroom. She hated lieing to Hazel but she had to keep this to herself, besides unlike Terrie Emma thought she deserved this.

Hazel didn't believe Emma all that much, but she didn't know who she could talk to about Emma. Manny would probably tell her it was nothing, besides she had a better person to talk to about Emma: Jay. She had seen the way he looked at Emma and knew he would find out what was going on with her. Luckily it was almost lunch and she knew where to find him.

When lunch rolled around Hazel draged Paige with her to find Jay, and he was where she knew he would be outside with his friends. "Jay we need to talk to you." Hazel said walking up to him. "About what?" he asked looking bored already. "It's about Emma." Paige was just as desperet to get to the bottom of this as Hazel was, she had told her all about the marks she saw on Emma's neck. "So what do I care, she's just cause girl nothing more." he said with his normal smirk on his face. "God Jay why the hell do you have to be such a fucking jerk?!" Paige screamed at him, she didn't want anything to happen to Emma she had been through so much already they weren't the best of friends but friends none the less she didn't want anything bad to happen to her. When he just smirked at her she glared and grabbed Hazel and they left him there. "God you can tell he wants her or wanted her why won't he just help her?" Hazel asked as the sat down at lunch. "Help who?" Craig asked as he came up behind them. "No one don't worry about it." Paige said to him. She didn't want to worry him, Craige and Emma were friends and he was protective of her more so now because of the whole STD/Jay thing.

Jay was walking down the hall during class, he actually had shown up for it but when he caught site of Hazel in the hall he asked to leave for a minute. Outside he played it off like he didn't care about Emma and a part of him didn't care but another part of him was worried and scared for her when he saw the look Hazel and Paige had given him outside, but he would never admit it he was supposed to not care for her anymore. A part of him follwed that rule but only because she rejected him and his ego was bruised. "Hazel wait up." he called after and ran to catch up at her locker. "What do you want Jay?" "Look I want to know what's going on with Emma." "why you said she was nothing more than cause girl, so why should you care." Jay gave a frustrated sigh, "Come on Hazel, just tell me."

She turend to look at him and closed her locker, "Fine when I was in the bathroom this morning I saw Emma and she didn't look so good." she stoped and looked down at the floor. "What do you mean by didn't look so good?" "I mean she looked like she was in a lot of pain, she was holding her stomach and was hunched over at the sink." "So maybe she has her period." Hazel shook her head. "No Jay it's more than that, I saw marks on her neck, like some one had grabbed her around it." His eyes grew wide when she said that and he saw fire in front of him."Where is she?" "Jay don't attack her she won't talk." "then why did you tell me?" "I..I don't know maybe I thought she would talk to you, but then you were back to your normal jerk self." he looked down and Hazel saw some kind of regret on his face but still saw anger in his eyes. "She's in Kwan's class right now." he looked up and nodded a thanks and left to find her.

Emma sat in Ms. Kwan's room trying to pay attention to her and what she was talking about, but again it was hard to concentrae on it. But she managed to snapp her self out of it, when Ms. Kwan's voice became a little louder. "okay class I want you to write a poem, it can be about anything you want, so don't be shy about it, just let your minds go. And no rude comments." she said to Spinner who smiled at her. "Oh and no names on these, they will be read out loud, but you don't have to be emmbarsed, so start working and pass them in at the end of calss." she said and went to her desk. Emma took out her pen and stared at the paper. 'If I can't tell anyone about what's happenign then I can get it out by writting.' she thought as the words came to her mind and flowed on to the paper.

_Untitled.(_A/N. This is my poem I just wrote for this story so don't take it and if it sucks it's because I just wrote it so I didn't get a chance to think. And don't take it.)

_Thought it would be good from now on._

_Had some one to help me, heal._

_I was wrong._

_All I see is evil when you come around._

_Why do you have to hurt me?_

_I know I deserve this for the things I have caused_

_My body is gone, you've taken it._

_Everything about me that I had left you've killed._

_I was hanging on by a thread._

_Now I'm gone, the one person that could save me._

_Isn't aroudn anymore._

_I'm your's to finish off._

_It won't take much longer._

_I'm half way dead._

When she finished she got up to handed her's in when there was a knock on the door. Both ms. Kwan and Emma looked up to see Jay standing in the door way. "Um ms. Kwan mr. Raditch wants to see Emma for a minute." he said looking at Emma. "okay Em, you can go." She wanted to say something to ask miss Kwan not to let her go with Jay, she didn't want to be alone with him, she knew Mr. Raditch didn't want to see her. But no words came out of her mouth and she followed JAt out and down the hall away from class rooms. "What Jay?" she asked with anger and sadness in her voice. "What's going on with you Em?" She looked up at him after that "What are you talking about Jay I'm fine." He gave her a look that said he knew she was lying. "oh yea then what's this?" he reached out and pulle dher hair back to see the bruises around her neck, she had been chocked and it was easy to tell. "Tell me Emma?" he said firmly to her and it scared her she was still very afraid of guys at the moment. A part of her knew Jay wouldn't hurt her like Kenny did but she didn't know that for sure. "Nothing okay, it's nothing." she pulled away from him and started back down the hall but he grabbed her.

"Emma something is going on with you why can't you just tell me?" now she was angry first he hates her then he wants her then he ahtes her again and now all of a sudden he wants to help her. "Just leave me alone Jay I'm not your problem anymore, I never was I was just one of the girls in the ravine. And like you said the last time, I'm one cold girl." she said and finally got her arm away from him and left him standing in the hall. Jay did want to help her, he could see some one was hurting her and it probably was Kenny. He knew him to have a short temper just like Jay but he didn't think he would hurt a girl. 'It has to be something else and I'm going to find out.' he thought and then another hit him. 'But if he is hurting her he would kill him, no women deserved to be hit' he thought as he went back to class. He still would not admit to her or anyone esle that he still wanted her back.

Emma got home that day only to find just her dad home. And he wasn't looking at her. She needed him to talk to her, he made her feel better when she was scared, just like her mom but her mother wasn't home right now. "Dad?" she said quietly and walked to stand infront of him. Snake barley looked at her before turing back to his work. "Hi Emma." that was the only thing he had said to her in weeks. "Dad please talk to me." she didn't notice her voice was breaking,but he did. He looked over at his daughter and sighed in frustration. "Emma I don't know what to say to you. You have become a diffferent person." "Then tell me waht you want to know and I'll tell you please just talk to me." "I want to know why Em. Why did you do something so stupid, especially with Jay?" Emma wiped her tears away when she saw the angry look on his face.

"Because I don't really know. I liked him and I wasn't in a good place at the time. It was a mistake and I'm sorry I disappointed you dad." "Sorry isn't good enough Emma, I'm sorry." he turned his back to her, again. A part of her snapped she was tired of peopel turing away from her. She was so angry that she knocked all of the pictures that were on the talbe off making them break and spread glass all over the floor. "You're not sorry _dad_!!" she screamed at him, "Fine you want to know what happen. I went to the ravien with Jay, I clamed into the van. I kissed him till he was hard, then unzipped his pants. I sucked him off okay I messed up!!!!!! Is that what you wanted to know!!!!" she was screaming at him with tears running down her face. Snake looked angry. "NO Emma that's _not _what I want. What I want is my daughter back, but she turned into another slut for some guy to use whenever he wants to get off!!!!" he screamed back at her.

Emma felt her breath leave her body when he said that, she had only done anything with Jay, and Kenny but she didn't want Kenny he had taken what he wanted. But she couldn't tell her dad that he would just say she wanted it and didn't want to get in anymore trouble. She chocked down her tears and tried to walk away but he grabbed her arm, right where the fresh sore bruises were. "Em, I..I didn't mean that." she shook her head and got out of his grasp. "yes you did." with that she walked down to her room. and locked the door. She didn't want to be near anyone.

Later that night Emma still hadn't come out of her room, even though her mother tried to convince her to get out and convince her that Snake didn't mean it. But Emma knew better she knew that he did. There was a tap at her window that brought her out of her thoughts. She got off her bed and walked over and opened it. Tyler was standing tjhere. "Come on Kenny want you at his house now." Emma nodded and climed out and went to his car and climed in. She took another look at her house, wanting some one to save her but she couldn't be saved this is what she deserved besides it had gone to far, she didn't fight hard enough she had only her self to blame.

Tyler drove her to Kenny's house . and let hre put telling her to just go in that he was waiting for her. Emma nodded numly and walked into the house, she closed the door wanting to just run out the door but knowing that she wouldn't get very far and again a voice rang in her head. The voice wasn't her own like the other times it was some one else's haunting voice. It was Rick's. '_Look what you've done Emma I'm dead and now your goign to get your's.'_ She shook her head when some one else's voice came through. "Emma get your ass up here!!" it was Kenny screaming from up staries. She lowered her head and climed the staires.

Kenny was at the top waitign for her, when she reached him he grabbed her arm painfully again and forced her into his room. He went and sat down on the bed and looked at her, she looked around the room and noticed that a couple of his friends were there too. All looking at her with the same evil smile that Kenny had. "I thought I would share you with the others." he said taking her face in his hand. "No." she said quietly and shook her head. "YES Emma." he said and gripped her face harder. "no strip." he said walking back. She just stood there, and shook her head. Kenny was going to get what he wanted form her again. He walked over to her and punched her in the eye. He pushed her down and Kenny got on top of her, sittign on her chest as he punched and slapped her in the face. "You'll..do...as..I..say!!" he yelled at her between pnuches and slaps. Emma tried to fight off the blows but it was no use he mannaged to get her hands down and away. Emma was on the floor crying when he was done beating her, but he didn't stop. Again he ripped her cloths off, and raped her agan along with his friends. This was it the thread was breaking. Her only hope was to leave and she was going too.

hours later they were done with her and she was a bloody mess. She got up and put her ripped cloths on the best she could and left the house. It was alte so one was on the street, and her paretns had gone to bed hours ago. She snuck back into her room and went o her closet and pulled out a bag. She started to throw clothes, and other things inside it.When she was all packed she quietly snuck upstaries and went into the bathroom to clean herself up. Looking in the mirror, she noticed a black eye forming, and cuts and bruises. There was blood on her face and blood coming from her nose, and ugly bite marks on her neck, and chest. And more bruises on her neck, they had chocked her till she almost passed out oir till she was gasping for air. It was all a game to them.

After cleaning up se went back down to her room, and took her things and climb out her window and walked to the car parked outside. She sat in the car for a minute calming her nerves, she was really doing this she was leaving and escaping the pain. But the voice came back,'_ Your punishment will come back Emma you can't run form it for long. Everythign is your fault and you deserve to die just like me.' _Ricks voice screamed at her. Shaking her head she started the car and drove off to the only place she could: Wasaga Beach, to Sean. He would help her.

She drove the two hours to his house, it was late but she didn't care. She needed some one, she wanted to be saved now. Gettign out of the car she winced at the pain between her legs and all over her body. All four of them did a real number on her. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door. She knocked again and it took a few minute for some one to answer. When he opened the door she felt the tears she had been holding back spill over on her cheeks. "Emma.." he siad quietly and pulled her into a hug and she fell asgainst him crying openly.

Sean was woken up by the sound of knocking , he had falledn asleep on the couch and draged himself up to get it. He saw that it was after two in the morning, and grunted rubbing his eyes. When he opend the door he was shocked by two things, 1)It was Emma standing infront of him. And 2) she was bloody and beat up. When she looked up at him he saw the tears fall form her eyes, "Emma.." was all he said to her before he took her into her arms and let her cry. "I've got you Emma your safe now." he wisphered to her. Sean bent and picked her up, and carried her inside. Emma knew that she was safe from Kenny here but not from her pain, he couldn't protect her from that.

_You can't save me_

_You can't change me_

_Well I'm waiting for my wake up call_

_And everything, everything's my fault._

_"Save me"-Unwritten Law_

**Okay guys here is the next chapter I'm sorry if it sucks but I've beeen writting this for a few days, anyway please review this even if you hate it.**

**Allie**


	4. Wounded

**I don't own anyone you should know that by now lol and I don't own the song either that belongs to Good Chralotte. And I'm an idiot I've had the cd this track is hiddn on and I never heard it before lol. **

**Thank you to every one who has reviewed the story so far and given me great comments I wasn't so sure peopel would like this when I started it but you do and I thank you, so I hope you like this chapter and please review, even if you hate it. Oh and if you have any ideas please let me know I'll keep them in mind if I ever need them.**

**CHPATER:4/ WOUNDED.**

_Lost and broken,_

_Hopeless and lonely_

_Smiling on the outside,_

_and hurt beneath my skin._

_"Wounded"- Good Charlotte._

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Sean picked Emma up off the couch when he noticed that she was having a hard time breathing, and placed her in the car. He drove as fast as he could to the hospital, and kept looking over at her she was drifting in and out. He tried to keep her awake as best he could, he didn't know exactly what was wrong but he didn't want her to go to sleep, he had to keep her awake. "Sean I'm tired can't I just sleep?" she asked when he parked the car. "No Em not now come on." he walked over to her side and leaned in to picke her up and carried her inside. "I need some help." Sean yelled when he rushed in, Emma was barley awake when he took out of the car. A doctor came and took her from his arms, Sean followed close by.

"What happen to her?" "I don't know she showed up at my door all bloody, and when I took her inside she was having a hard time breathing. Is she going to be okay?" you could tell Sean was in a panic. "What's her name?" "Emma, is she okay?" "I don't know yet, your going to have to wait out side." a nurse tried to make him leave but he wouldn't. "I won't get in the way but I'm not leaving her." he said firmly, the doctor nodded and went back to Emma. She started to stir a little, on the uncomfortable bed and moaned before she woke up a little more. "Emma can you here me?" the doctor said. She nodded her head and looked around her, "Sean?" she asked in a weak voice. "I'm here Em." he said walking over to her side and took her hand and placed his other on her head. "It hurts Sean it really hurts." she said and he noticed tears coming from her eyes.

"Emma can you tell us what happen to you tonight and over the last few days?" the doctor said to her, she had noticed the older bruises among the others. "I got what was coming to me." she said and turned her head to look over at her. "What does that mean honey?" "I caused so much pain that it was my turn to feel pain." she told her and then screamed when the doctor felt along her ribs. "get and x-ray machine down here I think she craked some ribs." the doctor told the nurse who nodded and rushed out of the room. "Okay Emma can you tell me what happen to you." she asked again but Emma couldn't talk she just shook her head. "Em listen to me please tell us what happen no one can help you unless you tell us." Sean told her gently and she nodded. "My boyfriend, he beats and rapes me." she said quietly and looked away from Sean she couldn't look at him, she thought he would be disappointed in her. But if she had looked over she would have seen the anger in his eyes. Some had hurt her and he wanted to kill the bastared. But for now he needed to be here for her.

"Okay Emma we need to do a rape kit, and exam your injuries okay." the doctor told her gently, Emma nodded her head but still wouldn't look at Sean and she kept her eyes at the wall. "It's okay Emma we have to call the police, and they'll have to talk to you. Sean I'm afaid you'll have to leave." she told him and took his arm, "but I want to stay with her." he said he was lead away from the bed. "I know but she would probaly be more comfortable with out you in there." the doctor took him outside. "Look I can guess you guys are close, and that she is underage so why don't you call her family and I'll come get you after the exam." the doctor suggested to him. "um yea just tell her that I'll be out here so she knows I didn't leave." he said taking one last look at the room where a nurse was taking things from a drawer. The doctor nodded her head and walked back to the room while Sean went to make some calls. Before he called her paretns though he called some one he needed here, and someone he knew would want to be here. He called Jay.

Jay was fast asleep in his bed when the phone started to ring, he woke with such a start that he fell out of bed and hit his head on the floor. "Damnit this better be good!" he snapped into the phone. "Jay?" he regonized the voice as Sean and looked over at the clock by his bed. "Man it's like three in the morning what do you want?" he said and got up off the floor. "Jay you need to come to Wasaga, right now." Jay could hear in his voice that something was really wrong, why else would he call and tell him to come right now. "Sure but what's up, what's wrong." Sean paused and Jay could tell that what ever he had to tell him it was big. "Just tell me." "It's Emma, she's in the hospital." Jay chocked on his breath, and felt his heart stop beating.

Emma, his Emma was in the hosptial. "tell me where it is and I'll be there as soon as I can." Sean told him how to get there. When they hung up Jay got up and dressed and threw some clothes in a bag and left the house, he left a note for his mom saying that he would call her when he got to Sean's and not to worry that it was an emergency. He got into his care and drove the two hours to Wasaga. Thoughts kept playing in his mind, why was she in the hospital, why Wasaga. Why did she go to Sean and not him.

Emma was laying on the bed with her head turned looking at the wall. The doctor was going to start the rape kit, and she had to hold back her tears when the doctor shut the lights and turned on a small one that glowed blue. "Okay Emma I'm just going to look to see if there are any fluids." the doctor said to her trying to make her as comfortable as possible. "fluids on her thighs and near her opening." the doctor said quietly to the nurse, but Emma still heard her. "okay Emma we found some fluid so we have to swab it it won't hut I promise." she didn't say anything back to her just nodded her head and felt the cotton of the swap rub against her thighs. "Okay Emma I have to an internal exam, it'll hurt a little but I'll be as gental as possible so just try to relax." she said. Emma tried to relax her body as much as she could, but when she felt the docotr start she tensed up and flashes of that night and before came to her and she tried not to cry. "I know Emma we're almost done."

After the internal exam a nurse came in with a camra. "What now?" Emma asked in a weak voice, she was tired and wanted to go sleep and she wanted Sean with her, she needed a friend and wanted him here. "We have to take some picutres of your injuries and then we're done." They snapped shots of her neck, where hand shaped bruises were red, and purple. The rest of her face, and the ones on her legs, and sides. They had doctumented that she had three broken ribs. They finished an hour later. "okay one last thing, and then you can get some sleep before you talk to the police and your parents get here. We found seman on you Emma, he didn't use a condom so we're going to take some blood and run every signal STD test we can okay." "what about pregnancy?" the doctor reached over on to the small table and held up a small cup with two pills in it. "I want you to take these, they are a double dose of birth control pills and will help against pregnancy." she handed them to Emma who swalloed them and laid back down. "okay I'll send your friend in and I'll talk to your parents when they get here. Your safe now Emma, and you didn't deserve this no matter what has happen in the past no women deserves this." and with that she left the room to find Sean.

Sean was waiting for the doctor to be finished and for Jay to show up, he sat down and placed his head in his hands, when some one called his name. Looking up he saw Jay running towards him, "you got here fast." he stated walking to his friend. " "Where is she? Is she okay? What happen to her?" Jay fired questuions left and right at him. "Jay calm down you can't go in there crazy she's scared enough." Sean said making him sit down. "What happen man?" Sean looked down and then back at Jay and he actually had tears in his eyes. "She said her boyfriend beat and raped her, she's a mess Jay. He messed her up." he said with a broken voice. Jay sat there in shock he was wrong Kenny had hurt her. He blamed himself for this, he had a feeling something was going on. The way Kenny would take hold of her roughly, and would keep her close by, the brusises, the marks, the distance she had put between her and every one else. Why didn't he listen to his insinct, he knew something was wrong. But instead he let his bruised ego get in the way and this was the price. "I have to call her parents, man what am I going to tell them." Sean said and walked over to the phone to call Emma's parents, while Jat sat down beating himself up over how he let this happen.

Snake was woken up by the phone ringing, he blindly found the phone and answered it. "Hello?" he asked into the phone quietly not wantign to wake his wife. "Mr. Simpson." he knew that it was Sean and he sat up in bed and turned the light near the bed on "What is it what's the matter?" "It's Emma." Sean said quietly he didn't know how he was supposed to tell him this. "What about Emma Sean what's goign on?" Snakes voice rose with each word and he felt paic inside him at the memtion of his daughter's name and the way it was said. At the sound of her daughter's name Spike sat up and leaned over to look at her husband, "what's going on with Em?" she asked him. "You guys have to come to Wasaga right now." "why there is she there with you? Did she run away?" he asked in panic. "She;s in the hospital you guys need to come here as soon as you can." "we'll be right there." with that he hung up and got up from bed and got dressed.

"Snake what's goign on, why did Sean call what's the matter with Emma?!" she was confused as to what was happeing. "she ran to Wasaga beach and she's in the hospital, so get dressed were going there now." Spike was out of bed and dressed not even in five minutes. "I'm gonna get Jack ready." she said leaving the room, to get the baby ready. Snake was left with his thoughts about what he had said to her before. He didn't mean it he let his temper get the best of him, and now she had run away and was in the hospital he couldn't help but blame himself. His thoughts were interupted by Spike coming into the room."Come on let's go." she said and walked down the staires with Snake close behind. They drove to Wasaga with a million thoughts running through their minds but no one spoke.

When the arrived at the hospital, they saw Seand and Jay sitting in the hall away. "Guys what happen to her? Where is she, where is my daughter?" Spike was almost in tears. "She's in the room, but the doctor won't let us see her till you got here she wanted to talk to you first." Sean said standing up. "God Sean what happen to her, please just tell us." Snake asked him shiffting Jack in his arms. Sean looked over at JAy and they looked down or away from them. "She showed up at my place beat up pretty bad." he told them quietly and looked up at them sadly. Snake and Spike were at a lose for words. Before any of them said anything else the doctor came out. "I'm assuming your Emma's parents?" she asked, when Spike nodded the doctor lead them over to a private waitign room, Jay and Sean followed them in. "Please jsut tell us what happen to our daughter, no stalling just tell us." Spike said tryign to hold back tears, she was shaking with fear and sadness. Jay walked over to her and gently took the baby form her, he sat down with Jack in his lap next to Sean.

"Sean brought Emma in here pretty badly beaten, she told us that she had been raped and beaten by her boyfriend. She has brusises that are at least a few days old, so this has happen before but I'm assuming this was the worst of it." Spike's attempts to hold back tears were all gone as she broke down. "What else is going on?" Snake asked since his wife couldn't at the moment. "We examed her and found cuts brusies and a few broken ribs, we found fluids on her during the rape kit, so we are running every STD test we can and should have the results back soon." She looked down not wanting to tell them anymore but knowing they had to know. "your not tellingus somethingwhat is it." Jay said his emotions were a cross between anger and pain. "The fulids we found and tested didn't belong to the same person, there were four differnt types. The police are here and want to talk to her, but if you would like to see her before they do you can." Emma's parents got up and walked into her room.

Emma was laying in bed when the door to her room opened, she looked over to see her parents walk in. "Oh my baby." Snake said and walked to her daughter and huged her and kissed her gently on the cheeck, not wanting to hurt her. "Emma why didn't you tell us what was going on?" her mother asked, moving hair form her forehead. "I couldn't, this is what I deserved." "Em what are you talking about, no one deserves this." her mother said to her, she looked over at her husband who looked away. "I caused so much pain, and have disappointed you and dad that it's all coming back to me, I got what was coming to me, I shouldn't be here Rick should have killed me." she said with tears running down her face. Spike was crying with her and just held her as best she could. "NO Emma you should be here, you don't deserve this you made mistakes baby we all have but you did NOTHING to deserve this. Do you understand we love you, Sean, JAy and the rest of your friends care for you no one balmes anythign on you." Emma broke down even more and Snake fianlly came over to the bed and held the both of them. "I'm sorry Emma I'm so so sorry that I made you feel this way. I love you so much." he said and kissed her head. "I know I'm sorry dad."

After Snake and Spike were allowed some time with her, the police came in and asked them to leave so they could get her statment. Even though it was ahrd for her to do, she told the police the story from the very first time Kenny hit her to now. "Okay Emma since you want to press charges against him we're going to go and arrest him, but there was more than just him tonight. Can you tell us who the other's were?" She nodded and took a deep breath. "Besides Kenny, there was Tyler Marks, David Anderson, and Jeff Collins." "okay Emma that's all for now." the police left her to get some rest, not even five minutes after they left she had fallen asleep.

Every one was still outside her room waiting to go in, when the police came out of her room. "What happen now?" Sean asked them. "She told us who raped her so now we are going to pick them up and charge them with rape." one officer said to them. "Who was it?" Jay asked them, he wanted to kill whoever had done this to her, and he just wanted to be with her to comfort her and tell her how sorry he was. "Kenny waters, and his friends, now we have to go and file the report." and with that they left. "I thought Kenny was a good guy, never did I think he could something like this to her." Spike said and sat down. "He fooled us all." Jay said and looked at her door. "Jay why don't you go in and stay with her for awhile." Snake said to him. Jay looked at him funny, of all people he neve expected Mr. Simpson to tell him to go see Emma, he wasn't sure if he should or not but Snake gave him a look of approval.

Jay walked into the room and closed the door behind him. he went and sat down in the chair next to her bed. She was sleeping so he was careful to take her ahd in his with out waking her. She didn't look the same, she had a balck eye, swollen and cut lip, cut and brusies on her feace, neck and collar bone from what he could tell. "I shouldn't have told you to not come to me, you can always come to me Em. I missed you,and I'm sorry I didn't stop this from happening." he kissed her hand and felt something wet on his face, bringing his hand to his face he noticed he was crying. Jay stayed in there all night silently crying and not once letting go of her hadn. He wasn't goign to let her push him away this time, he was going to be there for her. She had been hurt for too long.

_So help me heal these wounds,_

_They've been open for way too long._

_Help me fill this soul,_

_Even though this is not your fault._

_"Wounded"- Good Charlotte._

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**Okay hope you liked this chapter, I'm not to sure about the ending of this chapter though so let me know what you think of it. **

**Allie**


	5. Untitled

**Hey everyone just wanted to say thank you so much to who has reviewed this story, I'm so glad you like this story. I don't own anyone in this story except, Kenny and his friends. And I don't own the song used in it, it belongs to Simple Plan. I'm sorry it took so long too, please review it because I'm not sure I like it very much so let me know what you think.**

**CHAPTER: 5/ ON THE BRINK.**

_How could this happen to me_

_I made my mistakes _

_I've got no where to run _

_The night goes on_

_As I'm fading away_

_I'm sick of this life_

_I just wanna scream_

_How could this happen to me._

Emma was released form the hospital after a few days and returned to school after being home for a week. Her mother had stayed home with her to make sure she was okay, it was nice to have her mom to care for her but it started to drive her nuts after a week. It took time but she finally convinced her parents to let her go back to school sooner than the doctor said to. Kenny and his friends had been arrested after she had given her statement but a judge had released them on bail so they were still around, which made her very nervous and had her looking over her shoulder constantly.

She was too scared to stay in her room, the window didn't lock and they could have come in at any time and do what ever they wanted. It had literally scared her out of her home when she found out, for now she was staying with Manny. But she knew she couldn't stay there forever. Jay had become glued to her and she was thankful for that, she needed some one to lean on and he was there for her.

Walking into school she felt everyone's eyes on her, they knew they always knew something. Some gave her looks of concern and others gave her ones of hate, they blamed her for what happen. Emma wanted to rip their heads off she could tell what they were thinking and they were wrong. It wasn't her fault, she had been seeing someone trying to help her get through this whole thing and it had helped some in the short time she had been seeing them.

Alex, Ellie, and Ashley were the ones who gave her the most trouble. Alex because Jay was staying by Emma's side, never letting her out his site, which was making her jealous. Ellie gave her trouble because Emma had gone to see Sean and was just paranoid that she was going to take him away from her. To Emma she just needed to get a life. And Ashley was just a follower, because her friend hated Emma she did too. Emma tried to ignore their remarks and hateful stares. But they followed her every where. Inside the walls of Degrassi you can't hide anything, eyes follow you every where. And it was driving Emma crazy. She just wanted to get through this and wanted people to stop talking. It wasn't any of their business, no one's but hers. And even she didn't want to deal with it.

She woke from her hell, she was in constant hell, when she was awake and when she slept ; images of that night haunted her every minute of every day even though she was getting help it wasn't making her demons go away. Emma shook her head to clear sleep and made her way towards Manny's room to wake her for school. Knocking on the door she opened it slightly and saw Manny on the bed still asleep. "Manny wake up we have to go to school." Emma said shaking her friend's sleeping form.

"Em I feel so sick, stop shaking me." Manny moaned and rolled over away from her friend. Emma started to feel a bit of panic, the only reason she was able to get through school was because Manny and Jay were there. Today she would have no one, if Manny didn't come. Jay had gotten suspended because Chris called Emma a leg spreading whore, and pinned her against a wall and tried to get some out of her. When Jay saw what was happening he snapped and left Chris with a busted lip, broken nose and a fear to set foot in the school. With Manny out also she would have to hear the comments with out any one to help her.

"No Manny you have to come to school with me. Please Manny I can't not have you and Jay not there." Emma said to her still shaking her oldest friend. "Em really I can't go I'm sorry, but you'll be fine. Chris isn't there and your dad is at the school you'll be fine." Manny rolled over and reasoned with her. Emma shook her head over and over again. "I can't Manny I can't take it, please." Manny sat up and grabbed her friend's shoulders and looked her in the eye.

"Emma Marie Nelson you can do this, you can be on your own for one day. And if something happens then tell your dad and he'll take care of it. And I'll be right here when you come back." "Look Emma I'm not trying to sound mean nor like I don't care, but you have to start standing up to them. The people that talk, they don't know you or what you went through, they know what that subhuman and his stupid jackass friends are saying. If want them to stop taking then go to school and try not to let it get to you. Stand up to them tell them that you don't care what they say. You know it wasn't your fault, tell them what happen to you Emma make them see that they are wrong." And with that Manny let her go and lay back down to sleep.

Emma got up from the bed and made her way to the guest room to get ready for school. When she finished she was dressed in a pair of low-rise jeans, and a plain long sleeve black shirt. She pulled her long hair into a bun and grabbed her bag to leave. After she said her good-byes to Manny's parents she walked out of the house, she saw Jay's car parked in front of the house. Seeing him brought a small smile to her face, he was her protector; the one guy other than her dad she could count on.

"Morning, Em need a ride?" he asked her when she approached the car and leaned down into the window and smiled a little at him. "Yea thanks." She said and climbed in the front seat. "Where's Manny?" he asked as she buckled her seat belt. "She's sick and isn't coming today." Emma whispered quietly.

"Emma are you sure you want to go to school today?" he asked her, he knew how hard it's been for her but she's fine as long as he and Manny are with her. "I'll be fine Jay, let's go." And with that they drove off to the school.

Fine wasn't what she was when she entered the school. The minute she stepped in the main hallway eyes followed her from every direction, burning holes through her broken and bruised body. She wanted rip off her ears so she didn't have to listen to their hateful, evil and fake sympathetic remarks. Every where she turned she heard; "Poor Emma she must be taking this so hard." I wish we could help her." Or "There goes the new school slut, you know she likes to rough." Or "How can she do this to Kenny he was nothing but sweet to her and she yells rape, just because he broke up with her. Stupid slut."

Walking down the hall towards Armstrong's class she kept her head down and tried to block out the sounds of their voices, and avoid the looks they gave her. Suddenly as she was walking a body slammed into her and she was pinned against a locker. Looking up she saw Alex, shooting daggers at her. "No one believes you Emma make it easy and drop these dumb charges against Kenny and the other. No judge will ever put the guys away on rape, you can't rape a leg spreading whore who gives it up to every guy." And with that Alex let her go and walked down the hall leaving Emma shaking too scared to move. Pain ran through her body, she still wasn't healed and slowly taking a few deep breaths she managed to move from the wall to the girl's bathroom.

Once she was in the safely alone in the bathroom, she went to stare in the mirror. She didn't recognize the girl staring back at her, the girl in the mirror was just a broken shell of the fun loving girl she used to be. Closing her eyes she heard the voices again taunting pretending they cared, she heard Kenny and his friends moaning as the forced them selves in her and laughing as she fought and struggled and screamed. The praise they gave each other when they hit her making her scream in pain.

She pushed her self away from the sink, eyes still closed she clamped her hands over her ears and shook her head trying to rid her self of the evil voices. All of a sudden she let go of her self and looked in the mirror again, she let out a blood curdling scream and punched the mirror shattering into a million little pieces. Picking up a large jagged piece she rolled up her sleeve and slashed her arm over and over again, dropping the glass and watching her blood run down her arm and on to the floor.

She was so focused on watching her blood drip from her put stretched arm and to the floor below she didn't hear the door swing open. Or people calling out to her, till she was grabbed and held against some one's chest while some one else wrapped her arm in paper towels trying to stop the blood. Once the cuts were covered she looked up to see she was leaning against Spinner's chest his arms wrapped tightly around her so she couldn't struggle. And Marco was pressing the towels to her arm, turning her head when she heard a soft female voice she saw Paige and Hazel standing there.

"They're all right." Emma whispered quietly, but they still heard her. "Who's right about what Em?" Marco asked her gently while pulling the towels away. "It's all my fault, no one believes I was raped, I'm just a whore." She said quietly as a few lone tears slipped from her dull hazel eyes. Spinner hugged her against his chest and gently ran his fingers through her hair, while Marco and the girls came over to help comfort her.

"How's her arm Marco?" another voice was heard from the door. They looked up to see Ellie standing there a look of regret and fear on her pale face. They glared at her, except Emma who was just lying against Spinner. "Not deep. Why do you care Ellie?" Marco snapped at her. They all knew that she and Alex gave Emma the hardest time out of everyone. Hearing her best friend snap at her made the regret and fear fade away and hate replaced them. "Your right I don't care, she should have cut deeper, we'd all be better with out her around." And with that Ellie left them with Emma.

"She's right. Every one would be better off with out me." Emma finally spoke up. "No Emma we need you here, we're here for you, we believe you, you are not a whore. And we're going to help you through this." Paige said to her in a gentle tone, and took Emma from Spinner and hugged her tightly. "I think we should get her to the hospital just to make sure she's okay." Spinner said. Paige shook her head and stood up and helped the fragile girl up off the floor. "No. We're going to take her to her psychiatrist, she goes to the same one I did." Emma had a hard time walking, so Spinner picked her up in his arms and carried her away from Degrassi, the other following him. She wanted to scream for them to leave her alone, that she was fine. But she couldn't find her voice and she wasn't fine.

'No one believes you.' Was all that was running through Emma's head, she didn't hear anyone speaking at all. She was falling over the edge and no one was there to catch her, how did this happen to her.

_Everybody's screaming_

_I try to make a sound but no one hears me_

_I'm slipping off the edge_

_I'm hanging by a thread_

_I wanna start this over again_

_Untitled- Simple Plan_

**Hey guys hope you liked this chapter, I tried to make this chapter really good because I haven't been able to update. But I do apologize for this being so late, I hope you guys still are interested in this story, and will review it even if it's terrible. **

**Allie**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys sorry it's taken so long, I've been busy with work and my other stories. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and waited patiently for me to update, it is very much appreciated. I hope you like this chapter. Oh and the song used here is not owned by me it is owned by Linkin Park. So enjoy and please review.**

**CHAPTER 6; FROM THE INSIDE.**

_I don't know who to trust no surprise_

_(Everyone feels so far away from me)_

_Heavy thoughts sift through dust and lies _

_(Trying not to break but I'm so tired of this deceit)_

_(Every time I try to make myself get back up on my feet)_

_(All I ever think about is this)_

_(All the tiring time between)_

_(And how trying to put my trust in you just takes so much out of me)_

After Emma's incident at school, her parents and friends became more attached her trying to protect her from the others around her, the kids at school tormented her even more than before when they found out what happen. Emma was considering asking her parents to transfer her to another school, that's how bad things got for her. She hadn't told anyone yet about her ideas knowing they would talk her out of it. But she needed to do this; changing schools would be easier for everyone. Her parents wouldn't have to worry about calls from the principle or here rumors anymore.

Manny could go out with out checking to see if Emma would be alright and wouldn't be shunned from Darcy and the other squad members, besides Paige anymore. She wouldn't have to try to keep Emma away from Alex, Ellie, and Ashley anymore; she would have her normal life back.

Jay wouldn't get in trouble anymore; from threatening anyone who even spoke to her the wrong way. He wouldn't be burdened with making sure she went to her therapist and making sure she was fine every moment of the day. He wouldn't have to think of her anymore.

Emma was thinking of her friends and family, she didn't want to leave them but she was thinking of what was best for everyone. She didn't want to hurt them anymore; she had caused enough pain in her own life she didn't want to cause anymore.

Emma sat on the couch of her home, with her homework set out in front of her. She had finally found the strength to move back home, but she still didn't like being home alone. So that day while Jack was napping in his room, Spike working late, and Snake at a meeting she had Jay with her. She liked having him around her; he made her feel safe again she could relax and stop looking over her shoulder, she could smile again.

"What are you smiling about Nelson?" Jay asked her looking up from his history book to see her smiling slightly. "Nothing, just thinking." She smiled at him. Jay smiled when he saw her eyes light up with her bright smile, the one he fell in love with. Yes he Jay hogart had fallen in love with his complete opposite, Emma Nelson. Thinking back he had come to realize he probably always loved her. And it hurt him to see her being torn apart day after day, knowing that he had something to do with her torment, which is why he never told her how he felt. He didn't think he was good enough to be with her, to be loved by her after what he had done. He was content and happy beyond belief that he at least had a friendship with her, and could protect her from the demons around her.

"I'm happy to see you smile again Emma, I've missed it." He told her truthfully while moving some of the stray hairs from her eyes. He wanted to kiss her again, but didn't want to push her he knew she was still trying to deal with the emotional troubles and fear the bastard who caused them.

Emma looked at Jay and saw something in his eyes. It was a mix between want, fear, sadness and surprisingly she thought she saw love. When his fingers brushed her face gently she felt her heart start to beat faster with anticipation, hoping that he would lean in and kiss her. It seemed a little weird to her that after everything she had been through she would want to kiss some one. But again she felt safe with Jay, she knew he would never push her or do anything to hurt her, and that's what she loved about him.

Jay had deiced to take a chance and started to lean into her; he was mere inches away from her mouth when the doorbell interrupted them. The startling noise made Emma jump while Jay leaned back into the couch and stared at his hands. "I'll be right back." She said quietly and got up to the door. She was still cautious of most things, so opening the front door was still something she shook at. But she visibly calmed though when she saw that it was a police officer standing there, and opened the door wider.

"Can I help you?" she asked in a slightly confused voice, holding her breath fearful thoughts running through her mind. "Are you Miss Emma Nelson?" he asked her looking down at the clipboard he held in his hands. All Emma could do was nod her head; a bad feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.

Jay looking over at her and seeing how tense she was quickly got up and came to stand next to her. "This is for you; sign here." The officer said in a professional tone, while handing her a folded document and the clipboard to sing. Emma quickly signed her name at the bottom and handed it back before closing the door.

"Emma what is it?" Jay asked her when she just stood there staring at the paper in her hand, to afraid to open it, she just shrugged her shoulders and turned back to the den, Jay following closely behind. She sat down on the couch the paper still in her hands. "Emma it might not be bad news, but you have to open it to see." Jay told her and sat with her taking her hand in his and squeezing tightly.

With a sinking feeling Emma opened the envelope and read through, what she saw was a legal document. Shaking hands dropped the paper to the ground below leaving Emma staring at it as it started up at her from the ground. Not hearing Jay calling her name, the only thing in her mind was the word she had read.

"_Miss Emma Laurel Nelson is here by served to appear in court on the 28th of November 2004, to testify against the defendants Kenneth Joseph Landers, Tyler Scott Marks, David Jacob Anderson, and Jeffery Brendan Collins, in the Rape trial of Emma Laurel Nelson"_

When Emma didn't answer him, Jay bent down and picked up the fallen paper. His eyes quickly scanned over the document and his breath caught in his throat when he saw the words on it. She was going to have to testify against the men who raped her, took away her dignity and the last bit of innocence she had left in her. She was going to have face them again, come face to face with the people she feared most in the world. And Jay knew he wouldn't be able to protect her when she was on the stand.

_Tension is building steadily_

_(Everyone feels so far away from me)_

_Heavy thoughts forcing their way out of me_

_(Trying not to break but I'm so tired of this deceit)_

_(Every time I try to make myself get back up on my feet)_

_(All I ever think about is this)_

_(All the tiring time between)_

_(And how trying to put my trust in you just takes so much out of me.)_

**Okay guys here is the next chapter, I know it's short and nothing really good happened but I hope you still enjoy it anyway. Please let me know oh and the next chapter I promise more drama will be happening. Please review.**

**Allie**


	7. All that I've got

**Hey every one I'm sorry it's taken awhile. Thank you to every one who has reviewed and has waited patiently for me to update this story. And I don't own the characters of the show, or the song that is owned by The Used. So anyway read, review and enjoy.**

**CHAPTER 7; ALL THAT I'VE GOT.**

_So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me _

_Off guard, red handed_

_Now I'm far from lonely _

_Asleep I still see you lying next to me _

_So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I... –"All that I've got"- The Used. _

The day of the trial was fast approaching and making Emma more and more nervous with each passing day. She wasn't sure she was strong enough to face them again, she didn't think she could sit there and have the whole life ruining event retold all over again. Her friends, family, and psychiatrist kept telling her that this would be god for her actually she would have closure, that when she was in the court room she would have all the power over them; that she could have the upper hand again.

Emma was sitting in the park gently swaying back and fourth on a swing, staring intently at her feet, not really thinking about anything. She was brought out of her daze when the swing was suddenly pushed a little bit faster making her jump in the seat and her body instantly stiffened as if to protect herself. Turning though she saw the sullen face of Jay and her body relaxed as he pushed gently, as they enjoyed their silence together.

"What are you doing here Emma; it's cold out?" Jay asked her breaking the silence. "I just needed to get out of the house and think about some things that's all," Emma said not taking her eyes off the ground. They were quiet again only this time Jay had stopped pushing her and was rubbing her arms trying to keep her warm. "What are you thinking about?" he asked her softly. Emma finally looked up from the ground and turned to look at him slightly. "The trial." She answered simply

"What about it?" he asked her sort of scared he was going to upset her if he pushed. "Just thinking about what's going to happen. I have to face them again, retell what happened to me. Have their attorneys tear into me about everything that I did in the past." She said getting slightly angry which killed Jay's previous assumption of how she would react.

"Emma calm down, the judge won't let them bring anything like that up." He tried to reason with her, knowing there was a slight chance it could come up. "Jay you know that won't happen, you know they'll bring it up argue that I've done things like this before." She was still angry at the fact that the defense could possibly bring it up and the judge could allow it. She didn't want her parents to hear about what she had done to Jay, she didn't want to disappoint them any further. And she didn't want to relive that part of her life.

"The prosecution will fight against it Emma, and if they bring it up fight against it. You weren't in a good place at that time, and just because you and I did that doesn't mean that you wanted any of them to do anything to you." Jay told her and moved in front of her so he could see her eyes. He knew Emma was stronger then those guys she could beat them, she just had to stand strong. "You can do this Em, no matter what is brought up; you're stronger than any of them." He reassured her and pulled her up from the swing and into his arms for a hug. Emma knew he was right she was stronger than any of them, because she was going to fight them as hard as she could, no matter what they said about her.

Emma repeated when Jay had told her that day at the park over and over in her head to keep herself strong, and she needed as much strength as she could get because today was the day of the trial. The day she would be testifying against her rapists and she felt her nervous coming up in her stomach again as she dressed in her room.

Staring at her reflection in the mirror Emma still didn't like who she was seeing in front of her. Her skin was still pale and looked sunken from lack of sleep; she was still having nightmares and some times refused to let her eyes close. Emma pulled at the long sleeve dark purple top she wore with a black knee length skirt. A knock on the door brought Emma from her trance. "Come in." she called and went back to pulling her hair back into a pony tail.

Snake stood at the top of the stairs and looked down at her daughter's room. "Emma honey we have to leave soon." She called to her daughter. "I'm coming right now." Emma said and walked up the stairs coming face to face with her worried mother, she gave her a weak smile as to reassure her that she was fine with this. "Let's go." And with that she grabbed her coat and walked out of the house her parents trailing behind her; Joey was watching the baby for the day.

At the court house Emma and her parents waited in the hallway outside the court room waiting to be called. Her Parents were sitting quietly while Emma paced back and fourth, the heels of her knee high boots clicking against the tile floor; she couldn't sit still at all. While pacing some one caught her eye making her stop in her tracks; it was Jay along with Paige. She gave them a small smile as they approached her, "What are you two doing here?" she asked after they gave her a quick hug.

"Well I thought that maybe I could help you after this; since I've done it myself not to long ago." Paige said giving her a small smile, even though as she spoke just those small words you could still see the hurt she went through. "Thank you Paige." Emma said and gave her another hug. "No problem hun." When they pulled away Emma turned to see Jay with his same smirk in place. "That doesn't explain why you're here Jay." "Well I wanted to be here for you, I knew you could use as much support as you could get." He said looking between her and the others in the hall. "Well thank you I could use you both after this." "Um Emma can I talk to you for a minute…alone?" Jay asked her looking between her, her parents and Paige, Emma nodded her head and followed him down the hallway.

"What's up?" she asked him once they were out of earshot. "I wanted to give you something." He said pulling out a black velvet box. "My grandmother gave me this before she died. She said it was supposed to protect me and keep her with me. But I thought you could use it today to help keep you strong up there." He said and opened the box that held a thin gold chain with a gold cross hanging from it. "Jay it's beautiful, but I can't take that from you." She said gently touching it but pulling her hands away from the delicate gold. "No Emma I want you to have this, please." He said taking it out of the box and clasping it around her neck. She smiled slightly and reached up and kissed him gently on the cheek. "Thank you Jay, for everything you've done for me." She said softly against his skin and turned back to her family Jay following close behind her.

After a few more minutes of waiting anxiously Emma was finally called into the court room. Jay took hold of her hand as her parents, Paige, him and her family followed her in and took their seats as Emma was sworn in. she sat nervously facing her family and her rapists, she wasn't scared of them anymore; she was scared of what her family would think after hearing what was going to be said in the courtroom. She didn't want to lose their respect for her again, that was all she had right now.

"Emma can you tell us what happened on the night of a Tyler Marks party on November 3rd?" the prosecutor asked her making her focus on her instead of Kenny and his friends. "That was the night Kenny first hit me." She told her not breaking eye contact with her. "Can you tell us what happened?" "When we got to the party I lost him in the crowd of people, and after awhile I needed to go home to make my curfew. So I went looking for him and someone told me he was in a room, when I went inside he was sitting there with Tyler and David along with some other people." Emma stopped to take a breath before continuing.

"There were pills, powders, and drinks all around them. I asked Kenny to take me home and he told me no because he didn't want to leave. Um I made a move to leave the room and he pulled me back. I was drinking and did some of the drugs that were around, because I was scared if I didn't he would hurt me." She had to stop for a moment and had to look down she didn't want to see her mothers face at this time. "Kenny was pretty out of it and asked me to go down on him, but I refused so he smacked hard across the face and left a bruise." She finished looking back up.

Before the prosecutor could ask her another question, the defense attorney interrupted. "Your honor that story has nothing to do with this case, besides my client was intoxicated as Miss Nelson says and couldn't have known what he was doing." He finished looking at Emma with a disgusted look on his face, but she ignored him. The judge dismissed the defenses objection and aloud the prosecution to continue with questioning.

"Emma please tell us what happened just a few weeks ago between you and Kenny." Emma took a deep breath. "He told me to wait in my room and that he would be stopping by and my mother let him in. he came down to my bedroom and he beat me and he…" Emma stopped at images of that day flew into her mind. Vivid images of him on top of her, her crying and begging him to stop, and the pain she felt that day.

Closing her eyes for a minute she forced them out of her mind. Once the mages were gone she opened her eyes and focused on Kenny, giving him a cold stare. "He raped me for the first time." She said her eyes never leaving his. "Emma you said that he raped you for the first time. What did you mean by that?" Her eyes focused back on the prosecutor. "The next day after I got home from school Tyler came to my bedroom window and told me Kenny wanted me at his house. When we got there Kenny was in his room with the others and said he was going to share me with them. I refused and he slapped and punched me in the face. He ripped off my clothes and raped me again and let his friends do the same for most of the night." She said with a few tears slipping from her eyes but she barely noticed them. "Thank you Emma."

Emma barley had enough time to calm her self before the defense started in on her. "Why didn't you call the police or tell a teacher or parents about all this the first time he ever laid a hand on you?" the way he said it was in a cold tone that made her feel as cold as ice. "I didn't want them to know, I thought that maybe it was punishment for me screwing up so bad this year." She told him honestly

"How did you screw up?" "I just wasn't myself I let me grades slip I felt responsible for shooting that happened at school earlier this year." She hoped that he didn't bring up her and Jay and what they had done. "Aren't you forgetting one thing though?" "No." she knew what he was going to bring up next.

"Emma did you and Jason Hogart have a sexual relationship, starting right have the shooting?" his cold tone never leaving. Emma looked at Jay that looked at her sympathetically. "It wasn't a relationship but yes it was sexual." There was no point in denying what had happened. "So you had a sexual fling with Jason and what was the out come of this?" "I got Gonorrhea." She said quietly but they could still hear her.

"Did you regret getting involved with Jason and contracting a STD?" "Yes I did." The defense attorney smirked slightly at her. "So is it safe to say that you involved yourself in a sexual relationship with these young me and then regretted it the next morning and that's why you are accusing them of rape because you once again screw up."

Emma looked him right in the eye giving him a cold stare. "I did not consent to anything that Kenny or his friends did to me. I did not ask them to beat me or chock me till I thought I would black out. I did not ask them to hold me down on a bed and force themselves inside of me. No matter what I did with Jay doesn't mean I want this to happen!" She finally snapped and yelled. She wasn't going to be pushed around and she wasn't going to let them win this.

The people in the court room seemed a bit taken back by her out burst but her friends and family seemed proud that she wasn't going to be pushed around anymore. After Emma was done with her testimony the judge dismissed the jury so they could decide on a verdict. No one knew how long it would take the verdict to come in. But Emma just wanted to know what was going to happen; she wanted to move on from this the best she could.

A couple hours later (I know it sometimes take longer than this but hey it's fiction.) Emma and her family and friends were sitting back in the courtroom. Jay sat on one side of her his arm wrapped protectively around her, Paige on the other side holding on to her hand, and her parents behind them. Emma felt her heart start to beat faster and faster as the jury re-entered the courtroom and took their places. She didn't hear the judge ask for the verdict she was in a fog of nerves, and it seemed like the day was going in slow motion and she held onto Paige's hand tighter and leaned into Jay's body.

As Kenny, Tyler, David, and Jeff stood for the verdict there was a silent tension in the room. "We the jury find the defendants Kenneth Joseph Landers, Tyler Scott Mark, David Jacob Anderson, and Jeffery Brendan Collins. Guilty." The boys looked like the wind had been knocked out of their bodies. While Emma sat with her friends with a smile on her face. She had beaten them and could now start to pick her self up in time she would be herself again.

_I'll be just fine_

_Pretending I'm not_

_I'm far from lonely_

_And it's all that I've got.- "All That I've got"- The Used._

**Ok guys I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. And I know it sounds like the end but it's not I'm going to write one or 2 more chapters of this one. They might take a little while longer since I leave for school on Sunday but I will put aside as much time as I can to write in it I promise. Anyway please review.**

**Allie**


	8. Move Along

**Ok guys here is the next chapter I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to get this up, but I've had really bad writers block I hate that I've been neglecting my stories school was just so crazy and I'm finally home so hopefully my updates will come sooner. Anyway thank you for being so patient with me and I really hope you guys are still interested in this story. So enjoy and please review.**

_Go ahead and waste your days with thinking_

_When you fall everyone stands_

_Another day and you've had your fill of sinking _

_With the life held in your_

_Hands are shaking cold _

_These hands are meant to hold-"Move Along" All American Rejects_

After the trial things didn't go back to normal as Emma had hoped, people at school were still cruel to her and Manny and Jay still tried to protect her from it. It seemed like everyday some one had something to say about her and it always stung. Emma had hoped that once the verdict came back guilty and people knew that she was not lying about what had happened that they would be different to her some how, but that wasn't the case; most days it got so bad she would cry in her room at night.

It was one of those days and Emma had locked herself in her room and was just sitting on her bed staring off into space, playing with the cross necklace Jay had given her the day of the trial; she never took it off, it made her days a bit easier knowing something he gave her was so close to her heart as she wore it. Today might be like all the others but today was going to be the last one like this. She was sick of crying all the time she was sick of pretending. She knew that she could never be the old Emma again, that girl was broken in tiny pieces, but she knew she could rebuild herself and take some of those pieces with her as she did.

The next day Emma was sitting at the counter at the Dot waiting for Paige and Manny to show up. She had called them both the night before when she made the choice to stand up for herself, she wanted to prove everyone that they were wrong but she needed her friends help with this. Emma was brought out of her thought of how she would do this by the bell ringing over the door, looking up from her hands she expected to see her friends but instead she saw Alex and the others walk in.

Emma felt her heart start to beat rapidly in a state of panic out of everyone's comments theirs seemed to hurt the most, she couldn't place why but every time they glared and said a mean hurtful remark always made her feel like she was smallest person on the planet. She looked down and tried to avoid eye contact with them praying to herself that they would leave her in peace just this one day. For once they didn't seem interested in tormenting her today, when Emma noticed them walk to a table with out glancing her way and let out a sigh of relieve and jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder. "Gee hun calm down it's just us." Paige said taking a seat next to the other blonde, while Manny sat down on the other side. "So Em what was so important?" Manny asked her

Emma turned to look at her oldest friend and spoke. "Well even after the trial people are still talking and snickering I know people are going to think what they want but I just want them to hear my side of the story, hear what I had to go through maybe then I don't know I'll get some closer and it might be easier to take since I've said the truth and I can take pride in that." She told her two best friends and waited for their comments. Both of the other girls seemed to think it over before Manny finally spoke up. "I think it's a great idea Emma whatever you need us to do we'll help." She said with Paige nodding in agreement

. "What do you need us to do?" Paige asked her "Well all I really need is support; I mean it's going to be hard to tell the whole school what happened to me I just really need you guys to keep me motivated with it." it was up to her but she knew at some point she was going to chicken out and not have the strength to go through with it. "We're here Emma all your friends are for whatever you need." Manny told her with a smile.

As the days passed Emma spent most of her time working on what she was going to say to everyone, she and Marco had convinced Mr. Raditch to let them hold an assembly so that the school really knows what it's like for a person to be violated and hurt that they needed to know the truth. It had taken awhile but he finally came around and the assembly was to take place during last period tomorrow.

Emma was sitting at her desk listening to music doing her work when she heard a knock at her window. Wondering who it could be she got up from her chair and cautiously made her way over to it; even though the guys were in jail Emma was still cautious of people and places she even considered sealing the window but decided against it, she wasn't going to be afraid forever. When she got to the window she smiled at the familiar face that was facing her and climbed up and opened it for him. Stepping away she waited for Jay to crawl through entirely. "What are you doing here?" she asked and sat down on her bed with him leaning against her head board.

"I got bored at home so I came to see my favorite girl." And she was his favorite girl in more ways than one Emma thought that he meant it as a friend but in reality over the past months he had fallen so deeply in love with her he just didn't want to push her to far because of everything she had been through. But keeping his feelings buried inside of him was killing him slowly from the inside out and he had to at least tell her the truth, he owed her that much.

Emma felt her heart start to flutter when he spoke those words, for a long time she was not very comfortable around anyone especially guys except Jay she could have touch her and a warm calming feeling would wash over her and she knew she was safe with him. She secretly wished that one day he would see her in a different light. There were times when they almost would kiss but something always happened to stop them from making that connection, she wanted it to happen but maybe it just wasn't meant to right now.

The two sat there on the bed in a comfortable silence till Emma broke it with a yawn she tried to hide. She hadn't been sleeping well for the past few night worrying about her speech she would be giving. "You tired Greenpeace?" Jay asked her and for the first time really noticing how tired and warn out she really looked. "Mm yea a bit I haven't been sleeping well." She confessed to him another yawn escaping her mouth and making Jay look on in concern. "Well come on lie down for awhile." Jay said and got up from the bed and made her lay back on the bed against he pillows. Once she was comfortable Jay gently placed her light purple throw blanket across her body and ran his hand over her head before turning to leave her to rest.

Before he got away from her Emma reached out and grabbed his hand making him turn to look at her as she opened her sleepy hazel eyes. "Stay with me?" she uttered her voice thick with tiredness. Jay didn't hesitate he sat on the edge of the bed and removed his shoes before he lay back under the blanket Emma held open for him to climb under with her. When his body was rested comfortably Emma moved closer to him and rested her head against his shoulder; falling peacefully to sleep. Jay watched as she drifted off to sleep kissing her forehead gently he tightened his arms around, "I love you." He whispered as he drifted off to sleep with her in his arms.

The next day Emma woke up to the annoying sound of her alarm and rolled over to make it stop. Once her hand hit the button and the room was silent she inhaled deeply and smiled, she could still smell Jay on her pillows and blankets. His scent was warm and comforting to her and that was something she needed today; today she was going to be speaking the truth to her school.

Finally getting herself out of the safety of her bed Emma dragged herself into her bathroom and got into her shower to try to wash away her fears. After she was done she threw on a pair of dark blue jeans and long sleeve pink top and put on her flip flops and grabbed her bag. With one last deep breath Emma left her room ready for the day she had ahead of her.

"Emma good you're just in time for breakfast." Her mother said when she appeared at the top of the stairs. Before Emma could say anything her mother had put her into a seat and placed a plate of breakfast in front of her. Staring at the food Emma felt her stomach lurch forward she was too nervous to put anything near her mouth. "Mom thanks but I can't eat I'm just too nervous to eat today." She said getting up from her chair and giving her mother a kiss on the cheek. "Em you need to eat something." Spike said in a firm motherly tone. "I can't right now mom if I put it near my mouth I'll throw up. I promise I will eat later." and with that Emma left her home and headed to school for the longest day of her life.

So far the day had been the same as it has been for as long as Emma could remember, the whispers the stares they still stung she hoped that after today they wouldn't sting as much and that the stares wouldn't burn her skin. So caught up in her thoughts of hope Emma didn't see the person in front of her and slammed into them, and the force almost sent her flying till a pair of hands grabbed her. When she got her footing Emma looked up to see Sean smiling at her. "Gee Nelson I see that I still have the power to make you weak in the knees." He laughed she smiled at him and pulled him into a hug.

"What are you doing here?" she asked as she pulled away from him a bit. She was a little shocked she had talked to him but hadn't seen Sean since the night he took her to the hospital. "Well Jay told me what you were planning on doing today and I thought you might need a little extra support, so here I am." He said and hugged her again. "I'm so glad you're here Sean, I need you here." She whispered as he held her close.

As the day went on Emma felt more comfortable and confident because she had Sean, and her other friends around her. They helped her stay focused on what she needed to do even though at most times she felt like running from the school and not looking back. Now it was too late, Emma was backstage waiting for her assembly to start and was trying to keep her stomach from escaping. And it was getting harder too because she started to hear the sounds of students filing in along with their whispers and laughter.

She stood frozen not hearing the words Mr. Raditch was telling the students she did hear them all settle down and silence fell over them all, all she could hear was her heart beating inside her chest, so when some one came up behind her and placed their hand on her shoulder she jumped at the contact. "Hey Greenpeace it's just me calm down." It was Jay "Hey sorry just trying to calm down." He smiled at her and pulled her into his body. "You'll be fine I promise you I'm going to be right here watching you I won't let them hurt you any more." Emma looked up into his eyes and knew he wouldn't let any one hurt her. "I'm still scared Jay what if they still don't believe Me." she looked down after she said those words and watched her hands shake. Jay pulled her face up to look him back in the eyes. "Emma listens to me no matter what, they say or do after this means nothing. You know the truth you're not hiding anymore. You can move on from this now. And you can do this Emma, your strong and get through this and we're here to help you if you need it." he told her and it brought a small smile to her face. Before she could say anything else though Mr. Raditch came out and told her that they were ready for her.

With one last Deep breath and look at Jay Emma turned and walked out from behind the curtain, she walked to the podium with out glancing at the students the lay before her but once she was there she looked up at them all. She could feel their eyes burning into her she closed her eyes and replayed Jay's words in her head and blocked out the burning eyes and focused on feeling Jays. She opened her eyes and suddenly she wasn't afraid anymore.

"Most of you know me and most of you think you know me. I know what people are saying about me and I know what you think of me, but today I want to tell you my side, my truth and weather you want to believe me or not is up to all of you after this I am moving on. After the shooting I lost myself, I had no identity I felt that what had happened was my fault and deserved to be punished. And then I met Kenny at first he was sweet and cared about me, or at least I thought he did. Then things started to change, he was mean and hateful towards me, then the hitting started but again I thought I deserved it, I helped bully Rick I didn't try to stop it so why not get this it's karma right." Emma stopped for a minute and looked at everyone staring at her but for once they were listening to her not judging her. So she kept going.

"He treated me like I was nothing just a useless piece of garbage that he could do whatever he wanted with. And when he felt like it he "shared" me with his friends. He raped me and then he let his friend's rape and beat me down, not just physically but emotionally. They took the last shreds I had left of my soul and destroyed it. I will move on from this but I will never be who I used to be because of them." She wasn't scared anymore she was free now. "Look I know you guys will think what you like about me and about what is real or not and I know that I can't change your minds by being up here. But at least now you have the truth you have heard me and that's all that matters to me now. I am moving on from this, I am going to try to rebuild my life with the people that really matter to Me." she said and looked over at Jay who smirked at her. "thank you for listening to me and I hope that from now on you guys remember to listen to both sides of a story before you say anything about some one, and I hope that all of you remember your own pain in your lives the kind of pain that changes you inside and out. I hope you think of that and don't hurt anyone even more than they already are." And with that Emma walked off stage and to Jay who grabbed her and spun her around.

When he set her back down he smiled at her and without thinking he leaned down and kissed her. The kiss caught Emma off guard but it was something that she had wanted for a long time so she just gave into it. Once they pulled apart Jay leaned his head against hers. "So what now?" she asked once she had caught her breath. "I think me and you should be together now, if you want Me." he said to her in a low voice afraid that if he spoke louder that the moment would be ruined. Emma smiled at him and laughed a little "Yes Jay I want you, there's no I want to be with more in my life."

Jay wrapped his arm around her and they headed out the back way behind the stage. "So Greenpeace you ready to move on?" "With you I think I am." She smiled and they walked out of the school together.


End file.
